?> this is annie | Monthly Archive | October
Archive | October, 2009

The power of failing

31 Oct

While writing a prescription on Wednesday, the podiatrist asked for my full name. After I told her, she said, “That’s a beautiful name.” It is, but it has always felt too regal for me. Besides, the meaning of Anne is grace, and I’m quite clumsy. If there were a name that meant “competent for the most part,” my parents should have chosen that one. But they didn’t. (more…)

“Hey, Annie.”

31 Oct

“Hey, Annie.”

People kept saying hello to me yesterday. Even firefighters waved and yelled, “Hi, Annie!” It was easy to stay in character.

The good, the bad, and the blind

30 Oct

The good, the bad, and the blind

The other night, Miles said something that, like so many of the things he’s said over the years, was direct and true. I’m too nice, he said. Initially I protested, and I whipped out a few tales that proved him wrong, but in a lot of ways he’s right. I genuinely want to believe the best about people, to trust in the truth of their words and to find goodness in their hearts. It isn’t my nature to assume the best — one of the things I first think when I see a man alone at night is, “If this guy forces himself on me, where do I run?*” — but I have a deep and desperate desire to have faith in people nonetheless. (more…)

Go turn a deeper blue

30 Oct

Go turn a deeper blue

James was my first friend at Time Out. He was (and still is) a walking encyclopedia of soul, country and blues; he was always introducing me, directly or inadvertently, to something I’d never heard before, some slice of trivia that led me off on a night of music-dork research. At our holiday party, we sang a duet of “Paint it Black.” It was great, mostly because James’s excellent singing voice balanced out my squawks, but also because it was the only time I’d ever found joy in that song. He came out to say hello the other night — hard to believe it was less than a week ago — and we remembered that unparalleled karaoke adventure. Good times.

A day bookended by song

29 Oct

This morning, I looked left and turned right. Going uphill seemed potentially daunting, especially after a weekend of luxuriously slinking into taxis, so I decided to take a different way to work. At the train station, I turned a corner and nearly collided into a man in crutches. We gave each other the sympathetic once-over and started laughing at our sad predicaments. He’d ripped a ligament and was due to de-crutch next week; we compared crutch tips. (zing!) When we hobbled out of the elevator to the lower level, we walked toward a bespectacled white boy who was about to sing to commuters. Funny sight, but he had the last laugh when he began singing the hell out of the Temptations. I caught his eye and he returned my smile while crooning on: “I know you wanna leave me…” That swirl of life, of strangers’ lives intersecting for a few flawless moments, made the day begin so beautifully. (more…)